The Bitch(es) is back

Episode 3.01 “Reversals of Fortune”

The wait is finally over. Gossip Girl’s 3rd season has arrived…and so has all of the drama.

Talk about starting off with a bang–this episode has it all. What was my fave and least fave about last night’s premier? Follow after the jump to find out.

Chuck and Blair. Blair and Chuck. C and B. They are my new favorite couple. Why? Because they’re so effing crazy! Most couples like to go on walks, maybe have a romantic candlelit dinner…but not our little NYC sweethearts. Oh no, their preferred couple’s activity is luring unsuspecting single woman into thinking they’re going to get sweaty with Chuck Bass. C turns on the charm (and me…) and Blair turns up the heat by walking in at the precise moment to find the hussie in his arms. B loves humiliating the girls and, let’s face it, Chuck loves the attention.

gossip-girl-season-3-cast-photo

Damn.

Oh how high the Humphrey’s have risen. It’s about damn time, too. Jenny, Rufus, Dan and Eric have all spent the summer in the Hamptons, sipping mimosas and soaking up rays. Jenny loves it (as she should). There was something about Lily being away because her mother is sick but I don’t remember her getting any worse. Didn’t she go into remission or something? Anyway, this begins the drama between Vanessa and Dan.

V doesn’t like that D is rich now. She says it doesn’t matter but homegirl just can’t get over it. Um, hi? Didn’t you date Nate Archibald and accept bomb-ass Opera tix? Did you not attend the Vanderbilt fam reunion last year? Gah, V. I guess your faux-dreadlocks have put a strain on your memory or something. Also, you’re so being used by Rufus’ half-son. Sorry boutcha.

Quick, call the press. NATE ARCHIBALD HAS A POTENTIALLY INTERESTING STORYLINE. That’s right, people. Josh Schwartz and Stephanie Savage finally listened to me. Over the summer, Nate met a very charming, beautiful grad student. He didn’t get her name until they ended their mile-high makeout session and walked out of the helicopter. The girl turns out to be Bree Buckley, the daughter of a Republican, politics-heavy family who’ve been the Archibald’s rivals for years. I smell some Romeo&Juliet action! Nate’s grandfather (who is possibly more sinister than Chuck Bass himself) is last seen on the phone, talking about how he finally has a chance to bring the Buckley’s down. UH OH.

This leads us to the biggest drama of the ep. SERENA. For about 3/4 of the premier, the audience is left in the dark as to her actions an intentions pertaining to her summer trip with Cater Bazin. Turns out that her daddy wanted nothing to do with her so she’s acting out until the word that his little girl is giving Amy Winehouse a run for her money. Carter is actually sweet and supportive (in a creepy, Carter-y sort of way) so I’m interested to see where their relationship will go.

Eric and Jenny kind of got the shaft in this one but no worries. It looks like that, once school starts, they’ll have plenty to deal with. Plus I love that J is finally over her “I’m glad to be an outcast” ‘tude and embracing her new expensive lifestyle.

Overall, I thought this was an excellent start to the season. It’s going to be a good one. To sum up my feelings, I’ve come up with a little “Gossip Girl by the Numbers” chart. Enjoy!

  • Number of Cute Blair Dresses: 3
  • Number of Cute Serena Dresses: 2
  • Number of Times Dan Made Me Hot: Countless (muscles and longer hair does a Dan good)
  • Number of Shady Serena Moments: Countless (She rode off on a fucking horse, for crying out loud)
  • Number of Weird hairdos: ONE (V, really. If you want dreadlocks, then just go for it. This half-n-half thing is just unnerving)

Hope you liked the ep and I’ll see you back here next week!

XOXO

Le Chev

Advertisements

Leave a comment

Filed under Entertainment, TV

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s